The Old Lightbulb Joke

We all know how the old joke goes:

Q.How many [insert target group here] does it take to change a light bulb?
A. N — one to replace the light bulb and N-1 to [behave in a fashion generally associated with a negative stereotype of that group].
(Thank you Wikipedia!)

This post, I must say, is not about stereotyping any group of people, it’s about how certain things are done here, in true Qatari fashion.

A few weeks ago our refrigerator decided to take break from its usual routine. It was working, but not to its full capacity. So until it was fixed, we could only open it in dire necessity. This bought quite a bit of frustration to the kids, since one of their favorite pastimes is to peer into the fridge for no apparent reason, I guess in hopeful anticipation something wonderful and delicious might have magically appeared since their last visit (they are almost always disappointed). Hmmm, come to think if it, maybe that’s why the fridge went on the blink in the first place.

The refrigerator is pretty new, less than 2 years old, and it was still under the manufactures warranty. We called the service company, and after a few days - yes days - and several runarounds later, 4 people showed up; one to actually do the job while the remaining 3 stood close by, seriously observing the prognosis. Seems the compressor was not functioning properly, and this was fixed on the spot.

The light bulb was also fused, so the foreman told us he will ‘soon’ be back with a new one. Over a week (and several frustrating calls) later he showed up again, this time with 2 extra men. The same scenario ensued, and work was completed in a matter of minutes.

Now a few days prior to this, a friend of mine had come by with a delectable and rather large chocolate cake. Due to its size we could not eat it all ourselves (well we could, but lets not go there). I had distributed parts of it to the neighbors, but about a ¼ of it still remained uneaten. There it sat, languishing on the top shelf, right in front on the diffused light bulb (yes, the compressor was fixed prior to this). K asked the men if they would like to take it with them and they cheerfully obliged.

So they left with the cake, a few plastic forks and a few riyals tip each. 10 riyals, or $2.74574 to be precise. Here, this amount can still buy you lunch, or even a couple of meals at small local restaurants.

So, how many _________'s does it take to fix a light bulb? Can't say.

By the way there is a shortage of 100 watt bulbs these days, can't find any in most stores. So I have to make do with 60 or 150 watts ...

Andak Djaaj?

These days the answer to the aforementioned question, which means do you have chicken is almost always ma’afi, khalaas - no more, finished. Of course, as you may have guessed, we are going through a chicken shortage these days. On rare occasions if I do happen to stumble upon a rare sighting on one of my sojourns, I go into the hoarding mode.

Similar to the egg deficiency this is also due to the recent bird flu epidemic. This is particularly agonizing in a country which, after cheese, loves chicken. Think chicken shwarma, chicken kebob, chicken kefta, chicken samoosa, chicken shish tawouk, chicken sandweesh, chicken puffs, chicken hariss, chicken escallop, chicken fatayer, chicken shorba, chicken beryani…I can continue, but you get my drift.

Prices for chicken have increased tremendously since my arrival as well. When I first arrived a whole chicken had cost 12 riyals, now it is 19 riyals. They sell chickens per piece here, not by the pound or kilo. They are also much smaller then what I am generally used to, so if I am making something that everyone loves, (southern style fried chicken comes to mind), I may use 2 or more.

We have however found a few solutions for this. First of all we have started to eat frozen chicken. I have begun to buy copious amounts of frozen boneless chicken breasts. So we now eat a lot of stir fries. But that’s as far as I will go, since I detest frozen whole chicken. I must admit I am also spoiled. I don’t want to defrost it, remove the skin and cut it into pieces myself. I usually get this done when I purchase fresh ones. This service is efficient, courteous and always free 'Madam chicken ready'.

A friend of mine has found her own solution. She hits the stores as soon as they open, 7:30 am, (it still bewilders me why everything starts so early here) and buys as many as she can lay her hands on and will also be able to squeeze into her freezer.

Now those who know me know I am definitely NOT a morning person. In college I would never register for a class which started earlier then 10:00 am, no matter how wonderfully enlightening and fulfilling it may have been. Even then I would drag my sorry body out of bed at 9:45 am whilst cursing myself continuously. Thank God I lived on campus and my first class was right down the hill. Some of you might be thinking I was too busy partying all night, but alas, not so. I was a CS major and spent many a night, often going into the wee hours of morning, spending quality time with my computer.

But K, who is a morning person, will often go out on weekend mornings and hunt down a few. Occasionally he will go to the wholesale market where one can purchase live chickens and have them ‘prepared’ on spot. Besides chicken, the wholesale market is also a great place to buy eggs, other types of meat, seafood and a large array of seasonal and extremely fresh fruits and vegetables.

Yet I suppose everyone is doing the same and everyone’s freezers are full to the brim with chickens. So, you might ask, what shortage? Maybe this is all an evil marketing ploy…



The following is a recipe for brined roasted chicken. Brining makes the meat well seasoned and juicier. I usually put it on a rotisserie since my oven came equipped with one, but the conventional method works just as well.

Roast Chicken

Ingredients
1 large or 2 Qatar sized chickens – about 3 lbs total
1 gallon water – or enough to cover the chicken in large vessel
1/4 cup salt
1 tablespoon sugar (optional)
6 cloves garlic, crushed
1 teaspoon crushed black pepper
1 lemon

Instructions
Put water in a large bowl and add salt, sugar (if using) and garlic. Cut the lemon into half and squeeze juice into liquid. Add rind as well, and mix well. Make sure all the salt has dissolved. Water should be salty, but not painfully so. If it is too salty add more water. Put chicken into this mixture, turn it over a few times, cover and leave in refrigerator overnight.

Preheat oven to 425 F / 220 C degrees. Remove chicken from brine and shake off all water. Pat dry. Place chicken on roasting pan and place in oven. Bake for 50-60 minutes until golden and juices are clear.

Let the chicken rest for a few minutes before carving.

Waffling About

I have a confession to make. I have begun to hoard things. This came about after yet another shortage of a particular food item. This time it is waffles. Now I am one who can live without many things, but a recently turned 4 year old cannot.

Like clockwork, it has been A’s morning ritual since we moved to Doha to have a waffle for breakfast every single morning. I sometimes wonder when he might get tired of them, but until then I have to indulge in his little idiosyncrasies. Back home, it was de-crusted Nutella sandwiches and, I kid you not, shwarma strips. But in the land of shwarmas, he won’t touch them with a 10 foot pole.

Eggo brand waffles are not easily available here. I once purchased them from my regular grocery store called the Family Food Center, but they have now discontinued carrying them. My next option was a store called Mega Mart where many western expats go to purchase their groceries. Mega Mart contains many comfort foods from back home (think Cheese Wiz, Oscar Meyer, Marmite for the Brits …). They also charge about 50% more than what one would usually pay, but this is a small price to pay for items that will bring comfort and retain sanity, namely mine.

There were once 2 Mega Mart stores, but the one closest to my home recently closed to make way for a brand new Carrefour. Carrefour can be best described as the French version of Walmart. Very nice, especially if you are in the mood for items such as soupe des poisons, gateau Breton, crème fraiche etc, but they do not carry many items that we are used to. So now expats flock to the lone Mega Mart in Doha. This also means that there’s a fat chance one will find the items they are searching for. After 2 fruitless trips however, we did get lucky. There in the freezer section sat a giant industrial sized box of, you guessed it, Eggo waffles. We grabbed it before anyone else could lay their hands on them.

My freezer is now half full of waffles, and every morning I take out one precious piece. I lightly toast it, butter it with some sublime French butter bought at Carrefour, and drizzle a small amount of Aunt Jemima syrup on top, also purchased at Mega Mart. I then cut it into small bite size pieces and place it on a Batman plate, since in the morning only Batman will do. Now my next project is either to wean A off waffles, or buy a waffle iron. I would bet on the latter.

The Weekend Project

Despite the fact there is an extremely large expat community here and our social life is steadily improving, there are some weekends in which we feel lethargic, and are quite frankly, downright bored. These are the times when my children need to be coaxed out of their doldrums, so I sometimes come up with projects to break the monotony and engage them in something enticing. Most often, our activities revolve around the kitchen.

Last weekend we decided to make cheesecake. Often the cheesecakes we get in bakeries here are excessively sweet and eggy, or are of the no-bake variety. Neither of these appeals to us, nor do they hold a candle to the ones we used to purchase back home, namely the exquisitely sublime ones from my favorite bakery, The Prolific Oven.

In one of my earlier posts I had lamented on the unavailability of Philadelphia brand cream cheese. Admitting there are many other brands available, for a good cheesecake I believe only Philadelphia will suffice. On a recent visit to the grocery store I saw row upon row of them in the cheese section. Cheese is a fundamental part of the Arab diet; therefore the cheese sections are amazingly well stocked. I will write more about this in a later post, since cheese is an integral part of my diet as well. Upon spotting them I decided to purchase a few packages before they became extinct again. At 11 riyals for an 8 oz. package they did not come cheap, thus hastening my desire to use them without much delay, before they had passed their prime.

I also bought a crate of eggs, since after cheese they are the second most important ingredient. Prior to the Philadelphia scarcity, we went through a long period of an egg shortage. Due to the recent bird flu scare, the import of eggs had ceased from a few countries (Qatar imports most consumer items). This brought an increase in the price of eggs, if one was fortunate enough to find them. The price of baked goods also increased. We basically lived without eggs for almost a month. This deficiency ended a few months ago, yet the prices remain unchanged. We now actually have an abundance of eggs, so much so that I no longer can find packs of six that I once bought, only crates of 30 are available. Sometimes the eggs come with chicken poop still clinging to them, thus forcing me wash each and every one prior to storage. Just an interesting bit of information for you all who live in quality controlled sterilized environments!

Back to the cake making. Both N and A like to help in the kitchen. They crushed the cookies for the crust. They break the eggs (clean ones of course), measure the sugar and other ingredients, and gleefully assist in mixing all ingredients together. H, who does not have much interest in the kitchen activities, is blissfully content he will have something delectable to eat after all this madness. He is however, my ally in the massive clean up operation afterwards.

When using a western recipe here, namely American ones, one often needs to be creative and find suitable alternates. Since graham crackers are not readily available, I substituted them with the classic British biscuits called digestives, which are similar in taste and texture. Eggs come in one size only, which are medium – ish. I therefore used 4 instead of the 3 large ones called by the recipe. Due to the addition of alcohol, availability of most liquid forms of vanilla is scarce; hence I used the more commonly available vanilla sugar. Also, I have a gas oven with the temperature dial in Centigrade (something very foreign to me), so I keep a conversion chart to Fahrenheit nearby. After burning a few things I also found out that gas ovens have a temperament of their own and get hot at a much faster speed. On my upcoming visit back home an oven thermometer is high on the shopping list.

The following is a recipe for the cheesecake my children and I made together. I hope you enjoy making and eating it as much as we did.



Boredom Beating Cheesecake

Ingredients:
1-3/4 cups crushed digestive biscuits (or graham crackers)
1/4 cup melted butter
1-1/4 cups sugar
3 packages (8 oz. each) Philadelphia brand cream cheese, softened
1 cup sour cream
finely grated zest of 1 lemon
2 tsp. vanilla sugar (or extract)
4 medium or 3 large eggs


Instructions:
Preheat oven to 173° C (or350° F). Mix biscuit crumbs, butter and 1/4 cup of the sugar. Press firmly onto bottom and 2 inches up side of a 9 inch springform pan.

Beat cream cheese and the remaining 1 cup sugar in large bowl until well blended. Add sour cream, vanilla and lemon zest; mix well. Add eggs, one at a time, just until blended. Pour this into prepared crust.

Bake 1 hour to 1 hour 10 min. or until center is almost set. Turn oven off. Open oven door slightly. Let cheesecake set in oven 1 hour. Remove cheesecake from oven; cool completely. Refrigerate at least 4 hours or overnight. Loosen cheesecake from rim of pan and remove rim. Store any leftover cheesecake in refrigerator.

Recipe courtesy of Kraft Foods.com, with a few of my own substitutions

The Big Chill

Winter had eluded us, until now. It typically begins to rain and the weather tends to cool off by early December. Yet by the end of the year it was still mild and dry. However, cold temperatures are now here with full force. The thermostat is hovering around 50 F /10 C during the days and dips to 43/7 at night, which is considerably cold for Doha. To top it off, the past few days it had also began to rain, bringing with it as expected much chaos and confusion. We have witnessed a profusion of accidents, several more than the average one accident a week I usually see. Since there are no rain gutters, huge muddy puddles abound everywhere, some as big as mini lakes in which our cars slosh about, giving them a mud bath. So now our cars are splattered and crusted with mud. Needless to say, no point in getting them washed while it is raining, but the lines at the car wash will be maddeningly long and frustrating during a respite from the rain. Patience here is truly a virtue.

There has been a lull in the rain for the past few days, but the temperatures are still quite low. There is no central heating system here (no central air conditioning in most homes for that matter), so we are relying on sweaters, socks and most importantly, space heaters to keep us warm. Our home is very open with high ceilings; therefore keeping it warm is quite an ordeal. In the main living room where we generally spend most of our time, we have 2 large heaters on at all times. Taking last year’s example of all heaters being sold out in the entire city at the onset of winter, this year we had stockpiled them when we first saw them, way back in October. Storing up on items is not an uncommon phenomenon in this country. Many items, both perishable and non perishable, run out fairly quickly so people tend to hoard things when they see them. I will write more about these shortages in later postings as well, but the latest item that I find to be missing from all grocery stores which I have visited is Philadelphia brand cream cheese. I had wanted to make cheesecake a few days ago, but my plans must be put on the back burner, so to speak, until I can locate it.

We have also caved in and bought a clothes dryer. We never thought we would need one since during the warm/hot months (which of course are most of the year) clothes tend to dry on drying racks very quickly, sometimes in a matter of a few hours. But these days they stay damp for several days, and often start to give off a horrible musty odor. The kids are happy though, now they don’t have to wear ‘crunchy’ clothes. Imagine the joy an appliance can bring!

But alas, we will only enjoy this cool weather for a short time. It will start to turn warmer in a few weeks, and by the end of March or early April it will become hot. By end of April it will become unbearably hot, so much so, that we only go out when it is absolutely necessary. We will try to take advantage of this pleasant weather as much as we can, then get ready for another 6-7 months of self imposed hibernation.